BEAUTY AND THE FOOL

• DAY 196
• FEAR FILES: ABIGAIL
• SCRIPTURE: 1 SAMUEL 25

Now there was a man in Maon whose business and possessions were in Carmel, and the man was very rich. He had three thousand sheep and a thousand goats, and he was shearing his sheep in Carmel (now the man’s name was Nabal and his wife’s name was Abigail. She was intelligent and beautiful in appearance, but the man was harsh and evil in his dealings; he was a Calebite).

I SAMUEL 25:1-3

When I first read the story of Abigail I wondered how this marriage happened. What could have made a wise and beautiful woman end up with a man that she described as a fool and her servants knew to be a rude, arrogant man? Every testimony about him was negative and his actions proved it. The way he acted with pride and ingratitude towards David’s men was a revelation of his character. So how did she end up with him? Was she forced into the marriage? could it be that she didn’t know that he was that way? did she miss the red flags? “There has to be an explanation,” I said to myself. But alas none is given.

Yet, we have too many Abigails walking the streets today. They are beautiful, intelligent, hardworking, and trusted but they made a wrong marriage decision. Unlike Abigail’s day, we can diagnose or suggest how that happened. Some were in love and blinded by it. Some didn’t take the time to discover themselves before they chose a partner, some missed counseling and some thought he would change. Whatever the case, now they are married. And if you have been married for a minute you will know that divorce is not as picturesque as they make it online.

Hold It Together

So, what do you do when you are stuck and have no option? You try to make it work and trust that God will come through for you. and this is what I believe Abigail did. As a wife of courage, she held her home together. The Bible says that a good woman builds her home. She did this by gaining the trust of her servants such that she was informed when trouble was brewing.

But one of Nabal’s young men told Abigail, Nabal’s wife, “Listen, David sent messengers out of the wilderness to bless (greet) our master, and he shouted at them [in contempt]. But David’s men were very good to us, and we were not harmed or treated badly, nor did we miss anything as long as we were with them, when we were in the fields. They were a wall [of protection] to us both night and day, all the time that we were with them tending the sheep. Now then, know this and consider what you should do, for evil is [already] planned against our master and against all his household; but he is such a worthless and wicked man that one cannot speak [reasonably] to him.” 1 SAMUEL 25:14-17

Her servants knew that she was capable enough to resolve the issue and she probably had done so in the past. Most times, women in bad marriages respond out of frustration to everyone around them or cover it so well they start to die in silence. this woman knew where her husband fails and decided to take that up so that they can be peace in her home.

Do Something

Then Abigail hurried and took two hundred loaves of bread, two jugs of wine, five sheep already prepared [for roasting], five measures of roasted grain, a hundred clusters of raisins, and two hundred cakes of figs, and loaded them on donkeys. 19She said to her young men (servants), “Go on ahead of me; behold, I am coming after you.” But she did not tell her husband Nabal. 
1 SAMUEL 15:18-22

She acted on the information she received. Abigail made hast to go meet David on the way. David was famous for destroying his enemies completely and if she didn’t do something she would have died because of her husband’s foolishness and so would all her staff. Doing something is a courageous move. often when we are in a bad situation we let it overwhelm us and we do not act effectively. A couple of us would have gone to embarrass the man at his party, sat down to cry, or wasted time regretting our decision. not Abigail. She said I will do what I can do. I am the intelligent one, it is up to me. Sometimes all you can do is pray, do that well.

Finally, she was wise with her timing. She knew that telling the husband in his drunk state was futile, so she waited. And eventually, God delivered her from the foolish man.

Then Abigail came to Nabal, and he was holding a feast in his house [for the shearers], like the feast of a king. And Nabal’s mood was joyous because he was very drunk; so she told him nothing at all until the morning light. But in the morning, when Nabal was sober, and his wife told him these things, his heart died within him and he became [paralyzed and helpless] like a stone. About ten days later, the Lord struck Nabal and he died. 1 SAMUEL 25:36-38

Dear Abigail

I know that Nabal is not the best choice of a spouse and you may regret the alliance but as a woman of faith, you can still do what is right even if your husband is Nabal. Don’t let his foolishness turn you into a rebellious disrespectful wife. Do what is right before God. Ask God for wisdom on how to go about your peculiar situation because the truth is only Jesus sees and knows your specific brand of Nabal. May the Lord strengthen your heart and grant you wisdom to do what is needed in that unpleasant situation. In Jesus name

If you are not yet married, let this be a reminder that you cannot just pick your partner anyhow or you will end up with a Nabal and that is frustration pro max. You may not be as lucky as Abigail and end up a widow that remarried a king. You could suffer immense damage. take your time and pick wisely.

Shalom