‘bearing graciously with one another, and willingly forgiving each other if one has a cause for complaint against another; just as the Lord has forgiven you, so should you forgive. ‘
Colossians 3:13
I think this one is pretty straightforward. If someone offends you, forgive them.
I know it sounds like I’m oversimplifying things. Because the truth is, not all hurts are the same. Some hurts are deeper than others. Some hurts are betrayals. Some things don’t feel like they can just be forgiven like that. You hear people say, Do you know what they did to me? And honestly, there are a truckload of reasons why we don’t forgive people. If we start listing all the reasons why some people don’t deserve forgiveness, we won’t have enough space here.
How do you forgive someone who abused your child?
How do you forgive someone who took the life of someone you love?
How do you forgive someone who shattered something that can never be put back the same way again?
And yet, even with all of that, the instruction is still the same. Forgive.
Costly
Jesus said that if you come to the altar with your gift, and you remember that someone has something against you, or you have offended someone, you should leave your gift there and go and settle that matter first (Matthew 5:23–24, NKJV). That means unforgiveness affects worship.
When He taught us how to pray, He included forgiveness in the Lord’s Prayer. Forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us (Matthew 6:12, NKJV). That means unforgiveness affects prayer. And the most painful part of it all is that the person you are holding a grudge against is often moving on with their life. They’re laughing, living, enjoying themselves, while you are replaying the offense and carrying the weight.
God is just
I’ve learned something over time. Sometimes the things I wish would happen to people who offended me don’t happen the way I imagined. But I’ve also learned that God always brings justice. Always. He makes sure people feel the consequences of their actions, while at the same time protecting me from the damage unforgiveness would have done to my soul.
Nobody offends you and goes scot-free. It’s not possible. God knows how to balance the scales. So if your fear is that letting go means they will escape accountability, that’s not true. God sees. God remembers. God judges righteously.
So let them go.
Let the situation go.
And allow God to heal you from the hurt and the pain.
If you are holding someone in your heart today, pray. Ask the Lord to help you forgive. Not because they deserve it, but because you deserve freedom.
Shalom
